Sorry Not Sorry 

  Kiss my ass he says…

All I needed was some simple information you know…

But I’m not even surprised. 

There was once a time when I would have felt hurt… Shoot who am I kidding. No fucks were ever and will ever be given about anything he has to say. 

All I can do is be thankful that STUPIDITY isn’t heridatory, BUT if it was I am beyond thankful that I got my smarts from my mother and not the two bit piece of shit that was her sperm doner. 

He doesn’t even deserve the title of Father because he has never been that too me. 

I’ve always said I grew up poor and you know what I am proud of that. 

While my sisters and I were going to sleep hungry at nights because my mother was struggling to make ends meet, he was living nice in America and expected us to be greatful when he threw a few US dollars our way… As if that could do anything. 

I am proud of where I came from because it has made me a much stronger person today. A person who doesn’t normally stoop this low to entertain such stupidity but God knows there is so much I  can tolerate. 

The time when I needed a father figure has long gone, that bridge has already been burnt and the void I once felt has vanished. 

They say time heals all things and I’ve had enough time for healing. 

I don’t know why I’m wasting my time writing  this, but I read somewhere that venting is good for the soul.

So I’m venting!!! 

I honestly have better things to do with my time, my life and my energy and I promised myself that I would only surround myself with positivity, but I swear the devil is up to his old tricks tonight.

I use to hate that man with everything in me, but I’ve come to realize that that’s just wasted energy.

 Why waste time on someone who had no qualms about putting one of his daughters on a bus to New York from Georgia, mere weeks after arriving in America, to go and live with an “aunt” she bearly knew…after he brought us up here to “take care of us” and on top of all that expected us to be grateful that you brought us here…when we have had to struggle and sacrifice for everything we now have… Everything we have gotten completely on our own…while he  spreads lies about us to his family back home…Grateful for what?

God be a shield because I swear the devil is trying to get me today!

Hate is too good of an emotion. You hate people you take the time and effort to care about and I honestly can give a fuck about him and his ass that he wants me to kiss. 

I have grown beyond his lies and empty promises and frankly I think him saying to kiss his ass is pathetic. 

Pathetic and stupid and dumb. 

Really really really dumb! 

I no longer expect anything from that man. Expectations leave room for dissapointment. So to expect nothing is to leave no room for any form of dissapointment. 

All I can do is pray. Pray that God takes away this annoyance I feel right now. Pray that my blood pressure doesn’t go up, pray that the devil goes back in his corner and leave me alone because ain’t nobody got time for that

God be a shield!!! 

One thought on “Sorry Not Sorry 

  1. My girl, it quite okay to tell it as it is, however in life, the only person could really disappoint you is you, you should NEVER expect nothing from nobody. that’s just my philosophy. hope this help.

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